I feel like I wrote this

My boyfriend and I function in very different ways.  This usually gives us a great appreciation for one another, but when we have disagreements they get weird.

Me: you said “this thing”.
Him: I did not say that. You’re putting words in my mouth. 
Me: *thinks* I feel like what you said was “this thing”
Him: That’s reasonable.  I can see how you might feel that way.

Huh?!  To me, they’re the same sentence and mean the exact same thing; but to my boyfriend one is this statement of fact, and the other is an acknowledgement of irrationality.

It’s strange, words are unusually important to him, and it takes a bit to get used to it.  He remembers pretty much everything I say, whereas I can barely remember the topic of our last conversation.  And because I talk my thoughts through out loud, sometimes I can offend him with things I haven’t even properly considered. To me they’re just flyaway ideas; to him they’re these meticulously crafted statements of my truth.

He thinks in very linear, logical and rational terms; I think in impressions and concepts and vagueness and blurry distractions and running-on sentences.  So he will make a comment, and I will grab that comment, interpret it, and then tell him he said this completely different thing.

When discussing how we’ve upset each other this way I have to be conscious to modify my sentences to include “I feel like...” or else the situation will escalate.

I’m not very good at it though. I end up creating these long ridiculous sentences like “though I know you are not responsible for my feelings, I feel like your actions have contributed to my feeling this way and I feel like I wish you would hug me in these situations.”

I also believe that a hug can solve anything.

Anyway, he’s hugged me now, so we’ve got our resolution. I just find it interesting how we relate to each other. In hindsight I think we’re both a bit silly.

Or, I feel like I think we’re silly. :P



PS. Happy 83rd birthday Nana.  I miss you like crazy.  Like, crazy crazy.  I think about you all the time, and I love you. I hope you're happy and content where you are. Xx.